can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
