he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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