Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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