Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
