My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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