I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
