i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
