I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
