This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
