He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
