"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
