It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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