I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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