Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I want to make a zoo with you.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Randomize
