Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize