So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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