The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
