He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
