His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
