she was so not down for the gang bang
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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