She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize
