I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Randomize
