Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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