For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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