you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize