morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
