How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
