Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize