I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
