I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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