Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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