i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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