New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
