..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Drake has all the answers
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
