redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize