Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I stole a fireplace last night.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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