There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
