He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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