i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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