im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
