For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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