good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
we're making bets on your personal life
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Randomize
