ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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