I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
