can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
