I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
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