Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize