Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Randomize
