It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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