If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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